If you suspect your child is being bullied then we hope this guide will shed some light on helping you understand what bullying is, and what you could do about it. As parents, we want nothing more than to keep our kids safe.
Signs your child is being bullied may be more subtle then others but rest assured we will try and explain all of the things you should be looking for if you suspect bullying is happening.
What is bullying?
It’s a behavior that is aggressive and unwanted by the person being bullied. This aggressive behavior happens mostly to children but can still happen to adults. It is when there is a power imbalance between the two which happens repeatedly over time by the bully to the person being bullied.
These two ingredients must be in play for it to be considered bullying. imbalance of power and repetition of aggressive behavior.
The aggressive behavior could be anything from physical to verbal. Spreading rumors, verbal abuse, threats, and even excluding that person repeatedly on purpose. These are all signs your child is being bullied.
28% of U.S. students in grades 6–12 experienced bullying
Verbal Bullying
Verbal bullying can be a little more difficult to detect because there is no physical harm that is taking place. But make no mistake about it, verbal bullying is just as devastating as physical bullying and in some cases could be even more damaging to kids in different ways.
The goal with verbal bullying is to demean and degrade the victim, all while the aggressor looks more powerful.
Like we have said above the entire goal of a bully is to make him or her self more dominate.
Physical Bullying
Physical bullying is what most people probably think about when they hear the word bully. This is when bullying becomes physical in the way of the bully physical hitting, kicking, or touching the person they are bullying. Some of these matters depending on age could result in criminal actions.
Physical bullying is easier to detect on your child as you will see physical marks and bruises. Unlike Verbal bullying where no physical abuse can be seen.
Social Bullying
With social apps like Facebook, Instagram, Snapchat and more linking every minute of our day it is easy to see how social bullying has become a major issue, four kids.
It is almost easier to bully someone on social media then it is in person. Social platforms link up millions of people and its not uncommon for bullies to use this method to reach hundreds of people with a single post, tweet, or picture.
What Are Warning Signs Your Child is Being Bullied?
What are some of the warning signs that your child could be the target of a bully? Here are some signs to look for that could be indicated that bullying is happening.
Of course, these sings could also mean that there are other problems at hand. Remember that every child is different, and every child can have off or bad days.
With that said you should look for patterns of behavior that are not so typical of your child to see if these are true signs your child is being bullied
- Physical marks or bruises that are unexplained
- Missing possessions
- Not wanting to go to school
- Afraid of riding the school bus
- Suddenly withdrawn
- Sudden grade drops
- Appearing sad, moody, angry, depressed, or anxious
- Difficulty sleeping
- Starts to bully others
- Starving when he or she gets home from school. (Bullies can take lunch money and food)
- Only uses the bathroom from home
- Feeling helpless
What Can You Do If You See Signs Your Child Is Being Bullied
Remember, most kids are not going to be running to tell you they are getting bullied. in fact most of the time it is a process to try and get the child that is bullied to confide in you.
This is not to say that some children will not come right out and say they are being bullied, its just not the norm.
Be sure to review the above signs, if you see a pattern of these happening you should ask certain questions to see what types of answers you get.
- Your shirt is ripped. Did someone do that to you?
- Your grades have been slipping, Is there something you want to talk about?
- You run for the bathroom when we get home, are you using the bathroom at school?
- Your starving when we get, are you eating your lunch?
Examine your child’s questions to these answers, sometimes this is enough to get the ball rolling and for your child to start to speak about a possible bully situation happening to him or her.
Do not get angry at your child, but try and reassure them that this is not that fault. Remember that at one point or another someone has gotten bullied. Tell them that even famous people have been bullied and that there, not the only ones.
Encourage your child to stay confident, even though it will be hard to so. Explain that bullies feed off of the response of someone feeling weaker than them, so explain to your child to keep there head up and act like it doesn’t bother them.
This will give the impression that there not being bothered by the bully and this could even make the bullying stop altogether.
Contacting the School
As someone who has been around teachers their entire lives, it’s not uncommon for parents to approach teachers and ask if they suspect or see signs your child is being bullied.
Keep in mind though that bullying typically happens out of the view of teachers and facility, however, if you feel like your child is being bullied this is a step you should take.
Remember that all schools are required to have an anti-bullying policy.
Here are a few tips before contacting the school
- List all facts before approaching the school.
- Do not just barge into school, call and make an appointment with teachers and principle and other heads of the school.
- Try not to accuse the school, typically bullying is hidden from staff.
- Allow the school some time to deal with the problem, but stay in touch with them.
Bullying Statistics in the United States
Data from the National Center for Education Statistics and Bureau of Justice Statistics on bullying. These statistics show an alarming number of bullying that happens within our schools.
The number of bullied cases by grade level form the 2010 – 2011 school year.
The number of students that were bullied by sector from t the 2010 to 2011 school year shows the following
Public Schools: Number of students: 535,900. The number of bullied was 0.83 percent.
Private School: Number of students: 61,300. The number of bullied was 1.68 percent.
Catholic School: Number of students: 27,500. The number of bullied was 2.08 percent.
Other Religious: Number of students: 18,900. The number of bullied was 2.26 percent.
Nonsectarian: Number of students: 5,900. The number of bullied was 1.84 percent.
